How to Keep a Girl Interested

This column is aimed at younger (college age) guys who want to know how to keep a girl interested. It comes to Sterling Gentleman by way of a lovely young lady in grad school — that’s right, she’s both lovely and smart. That’s a killer combination. Here’s her advice:

You were lucky enough to get the first date and you didn’t screw up and you’ve had a second date and beyond. So now what? Now you have to be on your tiptop game to keep her around. Girls get bored of guys just like guys get bored of girls so here is some advance for you to keep her attention and earn her affection.

 

First off, show interest in her! You don’t have to send her a good morning text everyday but if you are making her text you first every single day she will get pissed at that and stop talking to you. We don’t want to feel like we are bugging you so don’t be dull when texting. Show us that you are actually interested in getting to know us as a person! If you just want us for our body then you might as well just say BYE BYE right now!!

 

Second thing, most girls love to be spoiled (well all girls do)! When I say spoiled I’m not talking about you spending every last dime you have to buy us everything we want. That is actually the complete opposite of what I mean when I say spoil her. The right girl won’t want you spending every last dime you have on her and she will even offer to pay sometimes, the right girl will want you to spoil her with your love and attention. YOUR ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS GUYS!! You can tell her things all you want but if you can’t back it up you won’t get far with us and you can say goodbye while we walk out the door.

 

Third thing, don’t tell us who we can and cannot be friends with! If something was to happen with a friend of ours it would have already happened, so trust us when we tell you, they are just a friend.

 

One of my biggest deal breakers is if all you want is to have sex with me! You might as well just go back to having never known me. If she is the right girl don’t rush things! Sometimes getting physical can ruin a relationship. If you want to keep her around for a really long time take it slow and hold off on doing physical things, but make sure she knows that you are attracted to her in that way.

 

When you are with your boys and she is with you, show her off. No matter where you go and who you are with SHOW HER OFF! She is dating you and only you! Make every guy out there jealous that you have her and they don’t! Some types of public displays of affection are good. She wants to know that you aren’t embarrassed to be with her and that you are comfortable with being emotional or romantic around your friends.

 

Hopefully this will help you guys get a girl and keep her around. Don’t be an asshole! Girls like the good guys that are gentleman and know how to treat her right!

How to get her to say yes

A guest blogger offers her take on how a guy can get a girl to say yes to a first date.

How to get her to say yes
Every guy has trouble getting a date with that one girl they are crushing on, even if they don’t admit it! Well here are some helpful do’s and don’ts to help you get the courage to ask her out.

DO’S
1) Be sure to clean up! Don’t ask her coming straight from the gym or in sweats. Present yourself well and make a good first impression.

2) Compliment her before you ask her out. Show her that you are interested.

3) Don’t tell her what you have planned for the date. Just ask her if she will accompany you on a romantic date.

4) Be nice, show her you can be a gentleman!

5) Be interested in her. Listen to what she has to say. Prove to her you listen!

6) Look her in the eyes!

Don’ts
1) Don’t ask her out in a text! You are basically ruining any chance of her saying yes.

2) Don’t show that you are nervous. Chances are she will be too!

3) Don’t act like you have a bunch of girls hanging all over you. Girls absolutely hate that!

4) Don’t act cocky. Be confident!

5) DO NOT ASK FOR NUDES OR SEX BEFORE YOU ASK FOR A DATE!

6) Don’t stand there checking her out!
These are just some of the things that will help you in getting a date with that one special girl. Believe me us girls notice the little things about a guy. So smile and look her in the eyes. Be confident in yourself. Show her you have an interest in who she is and not in her body. This will get you on her good side and definitely get you chances for more dates!

What do you think? What’s worked for you in getting a girl to yes? Or, girls, how can a guy win you over when asking you out?

What Do Women Notice About Men?

If you’re a true gentleman (or aspire to be so), you want to dress and act in a way that exudes confidence.  And of course, you want ladies to notice you.

We asked the question: What Do Women Notice About Men? And @ThePreppyBelle was kind enough to give us some insight.

Gentlemen, when a lady talks, you listen! So, here goes.  Some advice from a woman on what you can do to get noticed.

Here are her 5 tips:

1) BE CRISP! I can’t say it enough. A good pair of ironed and creased khakis is very impressive to a woman. Always iron your clothes properly (that’s right, even a t-shirt).

SG Says: Sure, you’re probably NOT wearing a t-shirt and trying to impress a woman, but the point is well-taken. GET AN IRON! And learn to use it.  Women are impressed by details.


2) Buttons. When you’re at a formal gathering and you’re wearing a suit here are the rules: when you stand up, you button your suit. When you sit down, you unbutton it. I learned that back in 5th grade at my cotillion class. When I go to more formal occasions, I can always pick out a man who knows what he is doing.

SG Says: The basics! Learn how to button your suit! On a two-button suit, you only button the TOP button.  Get it right.  Women are watching.


3. Pants. Make sure your pants are long enough (to the top of the foot). And if they aren’t, make sure your socks match what you’re wearing  (and each other!) if they are visible.

SG Says: Basics and details, guys.  Socks ARE an important detail!


4. Sunglasses. I find a man wearing croakies with sunglasses attractive. For both men and women, I think it’s essential to have two pairs of good sunglasses; one brown pair and one black pair. Try to wear the brown ones when you are wearing clothes in that color scheme and black when you’re wearing black.

SG Says: Basic stuff, sound advice.  And if you’re in the market for sunglasses, check this out!


5. Cologne. Cologne adds a statement what you’re wearing. Do not let your scent wear you, you should wear it. Simply meaning, don’t bathe in it. Just squirt the air and walk through the mist. Be considerate to the others around you (especially if you’re traveling with them). Some of my favorite scents on men are: -Nautica – Black by Kenneth Cole – Polo by Ralph Lauren – #2 Big Pony Collection by Ralph Lauren

SG Says: More on men’s fragrance here.

Thanks to @ThePreppyBelle for her words of wisdom.

For more advice on men’s style and fashion, follow me @TheSterlingGent

 

How to Impress a Woman on a First Date

A gentleman is strong.  He is confident.  He approaches the woman he wishes to take on a date and asks.  He speaks to her directly (he doesn’t ask for the date by text).  She says “yes.”

Now what?  How does a gentleman (or aspiring gentleman) handle the sometimes awkward moments that make up most first dates?

Here at Sterling Gentleman, we decided to ask a woman for her perspective on how a man can go about making a strong impression on that all important first date.

The lovely Carley agreed to share her thoughts on how to impress a woman on a first date and we’re sharing them with you.  Here goes.

So, you’ve asked a girl out and she’s said yes…now, what do you do?  What does she expect out of the date?  You want to impress her, right?  Here’s some tips on how to do just that.

First of all, just be yourself.  I personally cannot stand when a guy puts on an act and tries to be someone he isn’t just to impress me.  Trust me; girls will know if you are faking.  If you are truly being yourself, we will feel more drawn to be ourselves and more comfortable around you.  It also shows that you are confident with who you are and there is nothing more attractive than that.

SG says: A gentleman is always confident, not arrogant.  Be calm, be confident, bet yourself.

Turn off your cell phone.  Cell phones make face to face contact harder nowadays due to the sole fact that we are all glued to them 24/7.  If a guy is on his phone during the date at anytime, unless it is his mother or an emergency, I automatically lose interest.  It makes it seem as though the date is just another thing for him and not important whatsoever.  Turning off the phone or just keeping it in the car during the date shows that you are sincerely interested in the conversations that the two of you are having.

SG says: Remember how you asked her out — in person, eye-to-eye.  You really wanted to be here, with her, or you wouldn’t have asked.  Now, pay attention to the lovely woman who has privileged you with her company.

Clothes make the man.  If you two are going to a nice restaurant for dinner, dress up a little more than if you were just going on a picnic.  “Dress to Impress” they always say.  Us ladies like a guy who knows how to dress himself.  (A.k.a. DON’T wear cargo shorts to Olive Garden.)

SG says: Every girl’s crazy about a sharp dressed man. And dressing like a gentleman is a lost art.  So, put on some nice pants, dress shoes, and a button down oxford cloth shirt and prepare to impress.

Eye contact is something that a lot of people overlook.  I like when a guy can keep eye contact during a conversation because it shows he is paying attention.   This is a rather important quality I look for in a guy.  This is another one of those confident attributes.   (This also may impress her father if you meet him, along with a firm handshake and coming from a daddy’s girl, that is a big accomplishment.)

Now the big one; conversation.  If you are going on a date with someone for the first time, there is bound to be some awkward silences.  That’s okay.  It happens to everyone.  Don’t panic.  Just think back through your earlier conversations and pick out something you talked about, and then ask a question about that subject.  She will be impressed that you remembered something and want to know more about it.  Keeping her interested in this way will show her that you are more than just a pretty face.

All in all, just be you, keep calm, and stay confident.  Confidence is one of the most impressing and attractive things that a man can be.  If something goes wrong, it is not the end of the world.  Laugh it off, and move on.  Women freak out about impressing men as much as men do about women.  Impressing doesn’t mean that everything has to be perfect.

SG says: The key takeaways are — eye contact, attention to detail (clothes especially) and confidence.  That’s how to impress a woman on a first date.

Thanks to Carley for sharing with us.  For more advice for gentlemen, follow us!